Missing someone?

Let’s all admit it … we all miss someone. Whether it is your old friend that you no longer talk to, your partner that is now not yours anymore, or other relationships, it is certain that every now and then, the feeling of missing someone just comes back to you - either it through some certain “signs”, or just a feeling that suddenly comes back. For example, in the past I have found very relatable Instagram reels, where they say that when you are doing something and then something just occurs that makes you remind of exactly one person - a term that that specific person says, a song that ties you and that person, or basically any other things. But after all, whenever this feeling comes back to you, you can’t really control it, and to tell the truth, it can greatly affect your mood and even your life. Because of this, today, I would like to share some of the tips that I find very helpful to deal with these situations.

Alright, so first of all, please realize that your feelings are completely normal. Don’t ever find your feelings stupid - whether it is about you thinking about a very short-term crush that you had a few years ago - your heart can sense things very well, you know? Instead of trying to hide away the feeling, which can possibly make you think of that specific person even more, realize that your feeling is real, and honestly, let your feelings out. Typically, when suddenly you think of a person who you miss, chances are, there must be something that must happen that is making you miss them - whether they have a very special place in your heart, or that there are things about your relationship with that person that doesn’t make you very satisfied - for example, a situationship that doesn’t work out. Instead of bottling up your feelings in your head, let your feelings out! Personally, my favorite way to achieve this is to journal everything that is in your mind at that moment - just dump everything down, even if the details even make sense or not. This is because you can keep your feelings all to yourself, but you still have a place to take all the thoughts in your mind away. Also, if you feel comfortable talking to someone about this specific matter, feel free to do so!

And if the action of journaling your feelings out isn’t fulfilling enough for you to get over the things, take out things that remind you of them. Chances are, if you really value things and that you cherish your relationship with that person, then you must have kept something from them - from things like handmade stuff to smaller stuff like a rubber band that they give up a long time away. I know that this can be hurtful, but personally, I would like to let all my feelings out and get over it rather than let my feelings out halfway and then there is something that is stuck in my chest. If you want to cry, please do so! If you want to just ruin all these things, feel free to do it, but just make sure that you won’t regret it afterwards. I know that the relationship between you and that particular person may have been good or bad, but at the end of the day, it must have been memorable enough for you to have that person in your minds a long time after (presumably) you guys don’t talk with one another anymore. Because of this, after all feelings have been poured out, think of these events not of sad times but of good times. If you are still keeping a grudge in your mind of that person, you will never be able to get through them - have a open mind, and realize that whatever you do, that person won’t come back to you (I know that it’s hurtful but it’s true, and you must be realistic about that). Instead of thinking of that person in a negative way, think of the time with that person as a good time, and remember to keep those positive things in your heart. Only when you are willing to release yourself from the pain (that you have had for a long time) and start to live with the reality (and accept that you can’t bring that person back) then you can start to get over those dangling feelings over your head. I know that it is hurtful and that it will take some time, but if you want to be happy at the end of the day, it’s important that you start associating with what happened as good times, instead of looking at its aftermath. Additionally, you can view it as an opportunity to learn - I am certain that from everything that is happening in yourself, especially something important like this matter (which has made you miss that person), you have at least gained something, whether it is about controlling your feelings, dealing with other people, or other matters. Dump every bad memory away from your mind, then learn from the relationship you have with that person - only then can you stop hating either yourself or that person, and start to move on. Best of luck to you all!